Who are you? Crossover with Dr Who
by MLaw
Summary: Illya has an unusual encounter...


Illya Kuryakin was walking around the corner to the London headquarters of the U.N.C.L.E. when he suddenly heard a strange pulsating noise coming from down a nearby alley.

There was a bright flash of light that temporarily blinded him as he fell to the ground. He automatically grabbed his gun from its holster, waving it front of himself, though he could only make out shadows.

"Sorry about that, she's been acting a bit temperamental as of late" he heard a voice."Here let me help you up, and you can put away that gun. I'm no danger to you."

The Russian felt a hand grasp his and with a grunt, was helped to his feet.

"Your eyes will be fine, just give it a minute,"the voice said not to worry.

"That is rather optimistic of you, considering you are not the one who has just been blinded. What was that light...a flash grenade?" As soon as the Russian asked that, he knew he was mistaken as there was no accompanying loud bang that was supposed to disorient a person's senses.

" _I am and always will be the optimist. The hoper of far-flung hopes and the dreamer of improbable dreams." *_

"That is rather lofty idealism, is it not?" Kuryakin steadied himself. Sure enough when his eyes focused he saw a man standing in front of him wearing a long blue coat, a frilled white shirt, black breeches and boots, looking very Edwardian. Behind the man was a blue police box, but Illya couldn't remember one having ever been in this particular place; an alley seemed quite an odd location for one.

"What are you supposed to be attired for, a costume ball?"

"Oh, I forgot to change my clothing, pardon me," the man disappeared into the police box. A split second later he stepped back out of it dressed in a fitted navy blue double-breasted suit and accompanying accessories that would have made Napoleon envious.

"There, that's better."

"Who the devil are you?" Illya demanded; he decided it wise to keep his gun drawn.

"Ah, very good. You've guessed my name already dear chap."

"What?"

"No, it's Who, not what," the stranger smiled with enough charm to rival that of Solo. "It might be easier if you just call me Doctor...yes, I am after all, _the_ Doctor. What might your name be?"

"The Doctor as in Doctor Who? That is ridiculous, the Doctor is merely a television character."

"A character on the telly? Isn't that a treat! Marvelous! One of my previous companions must have pitched it for a television show," the Doctor mused. "Now your name sir?"

"Kuryakin, Illya Kuryakin. Who do you work for, really? It is T.H.R.U.S.H.?"

"Working for a bird? Now I've heard everything and considering how many lifetimes I've been through already, that's saying a lot. Though there is a ruling class of birds on Chalicis 3, though they are an entire race of birds that fly in their sleep and never wake. Their proximity induces sleep, so it's not a very exciting planet to visit, unless of course if you need a good long rest...but here on Earth, I've never heard of an avian ruling class…"

He looked into Illya's blue eyes, sensing confusion and perhaps fear. The Doctor had an instinct about that sort of thing.

"You don't need to be afraid of me; I am truly the Doctor, a time Lord you know. Really you can put away your gun. I give you my word I'm not going to hurt you."

"I am not afraid, and surely you are a lunatic thinking you are a television character." He pointed his gun at the Doctor.

"I think not Illya." The doctor reached into his breast pocket, drawing out what looked like an UNCLE communicator pen.

"Who are you going to call?" Illya demanded.

"You don't have to keep saying my name. Now call someone, on this?" The Doctor chuckled. He suddenly pointed it at Kuryakin's special, and a blue beam of light emanated from it. "There, that should keep your gun from going off."

Illya squeezed the trigger, but nothing happened. He let it fall to the ground and started to slowly raise his hands.

"What sort of weapon is that?"

"This?" The Doctor looked at the device in his hand." Oh this isn't a weapon, it's my sonic screwdriver. It's just a tool that has electromagnetic properties and abilities. Though its powerful frequencies and signals can create a sonic blast while using green sonic energy waves. Still it's just a handy tool. You mustn't be afraid of me Illya. I'm not going to harm you or anyone else for that matter."

"My friend Clara once said something rather brilliant… _"Fear doesn't have to make you cruel or cowardly… fear can make you kind. It doesn't matter if there's nothing under the bed or in the dark, so long as you know it's ok to be afraid of it. So, listen. If you listen to nothing else, listen to this. You're always going to be afraid, even if you learn to hide it. fear is like… a companion. A constant companion, always there. But that's okay, because fear can bring us together. Fear can bring you home."_ *

Kuryakin was entranced by the man's words as they were rang quite true, but he finally shook himself of it.

"So am I your prisoner or not...Doctor?"

"Oh absolutely not," the man looked at a pocket watch he took from his coat pocket. "Sorry but I must be leaving, that is if the Tardis behaves herself. I think I owe her an apology, as I insulted her earlier."

"Are you really the Doctor?" Illya called to him as the man stepped away.

"Yes I am, just as you are the real Illya Kuryakin. We each have our stories _We're all stories, in the end… just make it a good one, eh?"*_

The Doctor opened the call box door and disappeared in an instant. It began to pulse and hum, the image fading in and out until it just disappeared.

Illya picked up his gun from the ground and holstered it. He shook his head, thinking it had to have been the gin that Mark Slate insisted he drink while they had been as the local pub earlier.

It had to be that, as no one would believe him that he'd met the real Doctor Who and saw the Tardis.

No one…

* Quotes from Doctor Who in his different incarnations


End file.
